Bambi Wins :(

So about a week ago my husband (the non-artist currently known as Dude), while channel-surfing, finds this show called Manswers.  (Excuse me while I have a good shudder.)  The show purports to answer burning questions men have but are afraid to ask, such as, “How do you tell if a prostitute is for real or an undercover cop?” and “What’s the fastest way to get drunk?”  (Shudders again.)  I know, right?  But look at it this way: if you’re a chick who’s lookin’ for love, now you have a foolproof way to judge the suitability of your latest candidate.  Just ask him if he watches Manswers.  If he says, “Heck yeah, I wouldn’t miss it!” – run for the hills, baby.

The episode Dude watched did have one redeeming segment, which was this one about “the most dangerous animal in North America.”  Turns out it’s not a tiger!  (Yes, they actually presented that as a possibility and then berated the audience for not knowing that tigers don’t live in North America.  Can I shudder here again?  Seriously.)  No, not bears, not mountain lions; the most dangerous animals are – deer!  They ‘splain that deer attack people to protect their young, that they are the carriers of ticks that cause Lyme disease, and worst of all, they have this incredibly irritating habit of leaping gracefully across paved roads at the most inopportune times.

Which, ironically, considering he just watched this show, is exactly what happened this morning to Dude on his way to work.

smashed yaris 1

Ouch!

We live on a two-lane road in the country that is mostly surrounded by trees. Dude was just about a mile from our house when suddenly a deer was right in front of him! Hard braking and swerving – and – he missed it! Whew, what a relief!

Which was his reaction for about point-oh-two seconds.  And then –  a second deer leaped out!

The second deer was not so lucky.

smashed yaris 2

And Dude’s beloved 2007 Toyota Yaris was not at all lucky.

smashed yaris 3

And he had just been making plans to take it in for its 30,000-mile checkup, too.  😦  Amazingly, the car didn’t stall and Dude was able to turn around and drive all the way back home. I knew Toyotas were awesome (I’ve owned several and wouldn’t buy another brand on a dare), but looking at the condition of the engine compartment, I am frankly astonished that it’s still driveable. Especially considering we can’t figure out where the battery went!

Happily, Dude is perfectly fine – not a scratch on him – and we recently paid off all our credit cards, so it won’t be too painful to come up with the $1000 deductible. (Painful, sure, but not “we have to eat peanut-butter sandwiches for the next year” painful.)

smashed yaris 4

Alas, poor Yaris! I knew him, Horatio, a fellow of infinite
jest, of most excellent fancy. He hath bore me on his back a
thousand times, and now how abhorr’d in my imagination it is!

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3 Responses to “Bambi Wins :(”

  1. Terri Says:

    Oh my gosh! I’m so glad Dude’s okay. And so sorry about his little car, I know he loved it well.

    (I’ll also add that I’m sorry if you’ll end up sharing your car for a while – hate that!)

  2. Lisa Says:

    All things considered, I’m just glad Dude is okay. What a mess. (Did you do any forensics and look for deer hair? Is that gross? I’m just saying, because we found some on my daughter’s car)

  3. Cindy Says:

    OOOOuuuccchhhh!

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